Secrets

Secrets of a Long-Lasting Happy Love Relationship

love-relationship

The secrets of long-lasting happy relationships are:

  1. Building a climate of practicing kindness, generosity, friendship, joy, love, trust & intimacy;
  2. Honoring the “bids” meaning the requests for connection, requests for a response, sign of interest and support, when hoping to connect, however momentary;
  3. Responding to “bids” by turning toward the partner;
  4. The partner recognizes the “bid” and respects that by engaging, showing interest & support;
  5. Each partner meets their partner momentary emotional need;
  6. Scanning environment for things they can appreciate and can say thank you for;
  7. Building a culture of respect and appreciation very purposefully;
  8. Scanning the partner for what the partner is doing right;
  9. Managing not to miss more than 50 percent of positive things their partners are doing;
  10. Responding to “bids” by showing they are there, showing to the partner that he or she is valued;
  11. Kindness glues the couple together;
  12. They build an environment of kindness and emotional stability;
  13. They show each other through kindness that each partner is cared for, understood, and validated—feels loved;
  14. They know and act upon the knowledge that ” when someone receives or witnesses kindness, the more they will be kind themselves, which leads to upward spirals of love and generosity in a relationship”;
  15. The partners consider kindness as a muscle. They exercise this muscle to keep it in shape;
  16. Partners know that good relationship requires sustained hard work;
  17. They treasure the development and expression of a generous spirit. They express this generous spirit a lot and let it come in when a partner makes a bid so that they can turn toward their partner;
  18. They enhance small moments of emotional connection and therefore constantly gently empowering the relationship;
  19. The partners practice kindness in hard times and during a fight—they consider that this is the most important time to be kind;
  20. The partners express negative emotions in a kind way;
  21. The partners consider that if you want to have a stable, healthy relationship, exercise kindness early and often and built kindness into the very backbone of a relationship;
  22. The partners practice kindness by being generous about partner’s intentions;
  23. The partners practice having an ability to kindly interpret partner’s actions and intentions charitably and they soften the sharp edge of conflict.
  24. Partners appreciate the intent of the other partner to do the things right even if they have executed it poorly;
  25. Partners practice another powerful kindness strategy revolved around shared joy.
  26. Partners show that they are there for each other when things go right. They think shared joy is actually more important for relationship quality. They respond with joy to the partner’s good news.
  27. Finally, there’s active constructive responding. If her partner responded in this way, he stopped what he was doing and engaged wholeheartedly with her: “That’s great! Congratulations! When did you find out? Did they call you? What classes will you take the first semester?”

“Active constructive responding is the kindest. Active constructive responding allows the partner to savor her joy and gives the couple an opportunity to bond over the good news. In the parlance of the Gottmans, active constructive responding is a way of “turning toward” your partners bid (sharing the good news). Active constructive responding is critical for healthy relationships. Those who showed genuine interest in their partner’s joys were more likely to be together. The spirit of kindness and generosity guides them forward.

Active constructive responding is critical for healthy relationships. Those who showed genuine interest in their partner’s joys were more likely to be together. The spirit of kindness and generosity guides them forward.”

The secret of a long-lasting happy relationship, proved by science, is that a lasting relationship comes down to—you guessed it—kindness and generosity.

Source of the article: 1 and picture: 2

Positive Words Research – Secrets of a Long-Lasting Happy Love Relationship

Hidden Secrets of Positive Words

Bringing Light

Researching positive words is always full of revealing interesting surprises. Each word holds his own secret once you know how to deconstruct the word. The secrets are in the written words itself. Here is a list of the hidden secrets of positive words. The list is updated constantly based on our continuous research and new discoveries. When we are referring to “word split source” we mean the source where we found the splitting of the word. The interpretations of the words are written by Positive Words Research if not otherwise specified.

Reconnect  →  re-connect → meaning connecting again The source where I saw the split of the word is in an article written by Ioana G.

Understanding  →  under-standing → meaning standing under something so make sure you choose wisely what you want to understand (to stand under) → The source where I saw the split of the word is the audio program Love or Above of Christie Marie Sheldon.

Remember  →  re-member → become a member of something again The source where I saw the split of the word is in an article written by Ioana G.

Disease – dis-ease → you have neglected ease in your life and your body is putting you on “forced zen” mode pushing you to look for your ease (to look for the ease of a certain organ in your body that you abused) → The source where I saw the split of the wor is in Louise Hay book “You can Heal Your Life”.

Gratitude in Romanian language is “recunostinta” which can be split in “re-cunostinta” which is translated in English with re-consciousness or re-notice or re-knowledge or re-conscious – which can be interpreted as becoming aware again of your higher consciousness which we human lose in the moment; gratitude makes you more conscious of the moment.

Positive Words Research – Hidden Secrets of Positive Words

God: SECRETS

Positive Words Describing God

God: Yellow!

Me: Stop bothering me and stop behaving like you are cool. You are not!

God: What happened?

Me: What? Nothing.

God: Come on. What happened?

Me: Uf! I have this website and I am trying to increase the traffic and I don’t know how.

God: Maybe I can help.

Me: You can not. What do you even know about the internet ?!?

God: Everything! I have created it.

Me: OMG, again with the same line… you have created everything and stuff… whatever… just leave me… I am doing something serious and you are distracting me.

God: Maybe you should do something fun… instead of serious.

Me: You know? I can not create like this. I should… like it. It should be… you know… fun.

God: Yes, fun, good idea.

Me: I will just do something fun for my website.

…After some time…

Me: God?

God: Sorry! Bussy!

Me: You are not busy. You never are.

God: What happened? You did something fun for your website and people like it?

Me: Yes. Exactly. How do you know?

God: It would clarify if I told you that I have created the entire Universe, with a lot of magic ingredients, and fun is one of my secret ingredients?

Me: Nope. And stop saying all these secrets to me. My friends always tease me because they don’t know from where I say the strange things I say.

God: From me of course.

Me: Exactly. This is what I am saying. So stop telling them to me.

God: Why? You always hear me.

Me: Uf! Whatever.

God: Hey? Do you want to know my future plans for humanity?

Me: NO!

God: What? Come on. Everybody wants to know this. Is like the biggest secret ever.

Me: Not interested.

God: I will tell you another day.

Me: Don’t.

God: I will.

Me: No.


Moral: There are no secrets. God is always more than willing to share everything with everyone.

Positive Words Research – God: SECRETS