4 Feelings Which Prevent You to Start a Completely New Positive Life

4 feelings to give up for a positive lifeAll people in the world have one common goal in life – achieving true happiness. The main factor that holds us back from leaving a positive life and achieving cherished dreams is, simply and solely, our own selves.

Whether intentionally or unintentionally, we allow feelings of regret, frustration, and shame to form our actions in the present and have a huge influence on our future. We put limitations on ourselves worrying about everything and holding stress in our minds. Trying not to give serious thought to our emotions, we replay past experience and mistakes in the head over and over again. After a while, we begin to accept this state of permanent tensions as the norm. As a result, it leads to serious health problems and even panic attacks.

When your positive emotions are tied to all circumstances in your life, this is no way to live. In fact, there are so many ways we can alleviate negative feelings. Once you no longer let them guide you, you discover the flows of natural calmness inside. There is an unchangeable truth – life driven by feelings won’t make you happy. Let’s shine the spotlight on some feelings you need to let go in order to start a completely new positive life and become a happier person.

4 Feelings Which Prevents You to Start a Completely New Positive Life

Anger and Bitterness

Did you know that these feelings can eat you from the inside? Making peace with someone who has hurt you is not only about forgiving the other person. First of all, it’s all about letting it go and relieving the pain in your heart.

If you hide your anger deeply inside, sooner or later it will leak out and affect people around you (and not just an individual who offended you). Remember that the one who angers you controls you. If possible, express your pain to the cause of your upset. This may help you move on without holding onto bitterness.

Negativity

What you send to the universe comes back to you, right? So why don’t you change the way you think? Honestly speaking, we all have been there. Sometimes life knocks us down, and we begin to feel disappointment in everything.

Negative thoughts may cause the overthinking which in its turn makes any problem bigger than it is. Thus, you center around a glass half empty then rather half full. You have to choose whether continue to feel bad about everything around or take responsibility for your own happiness. Believe that there are so many things to be grateful for. Decide to appreciate them, around yourself with positive-minded people, and you’ll see there is nothing impossible for a positive thinker.

Insecurity

People full of happiness tend to accept who they are, radiate confidence and don’t look back. Spending too much time in past and reflecting upon old mistakes leads to the new failures over and over again. On the other side, thinking too much about the future evokes monsters and worries in your mind.

There is no need to be insecure in life. If there is something that makes you feel concern about, go out your comfort zone and strive to change it. Focus on things that are going on around you at this moment, because only you have the power to create the better version of yourself.

Jealousy

People who show jealous of other’s success can’t live a happy positive life. True freedom comes when you appreciate what you have and feel no envy at others. Every person is unique. So if someone has something you want, don’t be jealous. Instead of getting offensive, set your own goals and do your best to achieve them.

Jealous can steal your happiness and bring negativity into your life. Don’t waste your precious time looking at others. Your days will be much better if you can overcome this creepy feeling.

Conclusion – Positive Life

Life will never be a plain sailing without challenges. There will always be dark hours as well as times of joy and pure happiness. But what the most important thing to remember is that even in the pitch darkness you can alway find sources of blessing. The only thing you have to do to live a full positive life is to stop being a slave to your feelings.

Author bio:

Veronica HuntVeronica Hunt is an edtech expert and an experienced content marketer from Philadelphia, PA. As a blogger, she sees her purpose in providing her readers with up-to-date info in the spheres of marketing, entrepreneurship, and psychology. Currently, works for Aplusonly as a content manager. Apart from work, she adores traveling and yoga. Follow @VeronicaHuntt on Twitter or find her on Facebook.

Self-Awareness Exercises For Happiness And Success

Self-Awareness Exercises For Happiness And Success

Self-Awareness Exercises For Happiness And Success

While most people are familiar with the term “self-awareness”, how many really know what it means?  And even more importantly, how many people understand how vital possessing self-awareness is living a successful, happy life?  The truth is that success in life, whether it be an emotional success, material success or career success, is largely a product of how we respond to the various external dilemmas or situations we find ourselves in.  Having a persistent loop of negative or irrational thoughts running through your head can lead to a variety of destructive habits, that if left unchecked, could send your life way of course or into a dark downward spiral.

Fortunately, self-awareness allows you to identify any thought patterns and recognize the problems they’re causing you in your day-to-life.  As a result, you’ll suddenly find yourself much more at ease while at the same time making smarter decisions that will lead to greater success in life.

Here are some exercises to improve your self-awareness:

1) Verbalize Your Feelings

All too often, people reduce their emotional state to one of two choices, “sad” or “happy”.  However, emotions are more complicated than that and if not properly understood, have the power to seriously mess with your behavior and physical health.

Articulating your thoughts and feelings is a form of therapy for your mind.  It stops your thoughts from racing around in chaos and allows you to step back and calmly assess what’s bothering, why it’s bothering you, and what you can or can’t do about it.

The real beauty of doing this, though, isn’t that you’ll necessarily discover a solution right away, but rather that it eliminates the ‘monster in the closet’ feeling caused by a restless mind.  Developing an emotional vocabulary allows you to objectively examine your thoughts and feelings in the same way you might examine your car that’s having an issue.  You can calmly look at it and assess what’s wrong without being stressed, emotionally confused or depressed.

2)  Go Three Levels Deep

If you’re about to make a decision, you want to ask yourself why.  This will start to clarify things for you and you can then go a level deeper and ask “why” to your first answer.  Do it again to your second answer and then you’ll have a solid foundation for your reasoning which will allow you to feel more confident about what you end up doing.

Knowing and understanding your reasons for doing things is a big part of self-awareness.  It makes you cognizant of your own behavior and allows you to give a thoughtful response if you have to justify it to yourself or anyone else.

3)  Desensitize Yourself To Visceral Reactions

Ever know anyone who’s constantly in a hyper-emotional state where everything is either the greatest thing ever or the worst thing ever?

These people have little to no self-awareness and live their lives going from one knee-jerk reaction to the next.

Self-awareness reduces the impact of visceral reactions.  It puts you in a state-of-mind where you don’t get overwhelmed by a rush of emotion and can objectively assess a situation and respond in a rational, constructive way.

So when an upsetting situation occurs – or when you think about a particular type of upsetting situation – stay calm and ask yourself why you’re having this response.  This lets you assess what’s happening and reduces or eliminates the feeling that you have no emotional control.  From there you can objectively think about what your best response, or non-response, would be.

4)  Think About What You’re Saying To Yourself

Whether we’re aware of it or not, we’re always thinking.  If that thinking turns into an endless loop of negative self-talk, the consequences can be quite destructive.

So during a tough or stressful situation, be mindful of the types of thoughts that go through your head.  Likewise, keep tabs on what you’re saying to yourself when things are going well.  Self-awareness allows us to monitor the negative or positive feedback loops that our minds create so we can then make the adjustments we need to feel happier and stay productive.

The key is to talk to yourself in a way that helps you to be motivated and challenges you, while at the same time staying away from self-talk that’s irrational or catastrophic in nature.

5)  Question Your View Point

It might not sound therapeutic, but thinking over a viewpoint that goes against what you believe can actually have tremendous mental health benefits.  If you do find flaws in your reasoning, then you’ll be wiser for it.  However, if your beliefs hold up, then you’ll have now battle tested them and feel that much more confident.

Additionally, playing devil’s advocate is a workout for your mind as processing and making sense of contrasting information actually sparks new neural pathways.

6)  Practice Reflection

It’s one thing to have a negative, erratic thought or two, but if these types of thoughts are constantly swirling through you mind you’re going to have a tough time finding consistent happiness and success.  By reflecting on your thought process you can determine how strong or weak your level of self-awareness is.  Do this by setting daily, or even hourly, milestones for yourself where you look back and evaluate your thoughts for the given time period.  From there you can assess how well you’ve done and determine what your goal(s) should be for tomorrow.

7)  Meditate

A cornerstone for developing one’s self-awareness, meditation is the process of focusing on a simple or mundane task (ex. focusing on your breathing) that allows you to pay attention to the thoughts going through your mind.  As you progress, you’ll get better and better at blocking out or extinguishing negative/ obsessive thoughts which will immensely improve your happiness and concentration.

Conclusion

If you chronically feel like you have little or no control of what’s happening around you, or struggle not to fall into destructive funks, constructive self-talk can significantly improve your mindset and life.  By applying and sticking to the exercises listed above, you’ll be surprised at just how quickly you reap the benefits both mentally and physically, while at the same time, unlocking levels of success you never before thought possible.

Daniela-Mcvicker

About the Author

Daniela McVicker is an author, psychologist and freelance blogger. She believes that success depends on knowing the ideas that allow you to manage and master the universe of information. You can follow Daniela on Twitter or add her on Facebook

10 Habits of Supremely Happy People

10 Habits of Supremely Happy People

10 Habits of Supremely Happy People

We all want to be happy. However, no matter how hard we want it, it seems that we never get there. And why is it, we wonder.

The truth is that everything in life is a question of habit. And being happy is no different. If you want to be happy, you need to make it part of your life. Every. Single. Day.

Yes, it sounds easier said than done. So how do we get there? By learning from whom has set happiness as their goal and achieved it.

So here are ten habits of supremely happy people. Get inspired.

1 ~ They appreciate little things

One thing that happy people have in common is the fact that they can appreciate little things that happen in their lives. Every smile, laugh, moment with a friend, walk out, anything that can bring them joy is celebrated as if they had won the lottery. They don’t think that only big achievements are meaningful.

2 ~ They build relationships and interact with people (face to face)

Relationships are crucial to happiness, and those who got there know it very well. So they spend quality time cultivating them. It means that happy people might not have many friends, but they will be close and loyal ones. They will be sure that they can count on their friends and family if needed. And they will meet them regularly in person, so they can share experiences and ask for support – something essential for happiness.

3 ~ They work on improving themselves

Self-improvement is at the top of the list of priorities for happy people. They know that they can’t change the others, but, if they can only change themselves, they might live much better. The enemy within you is usually much harder to deal, but the reward for those who have accomplished is priceless, they believe. So happy people are aware of their flaws and try their best to become a better person every day.

4 ~ They spend their time on what matters for them

Happy people know that time is precious, so they won’t waste it on activities that have no meaning for them. They know what brings them joy, and what their goals are, and they will prioritize both. They won’t be impressed by any type of pressure coming from outside, even if it happens to be disguised as an urgency. They also know that they excel when doing what they love, so rarely they try to change it.

5 ~ They show gratitude

People who have achieved happiness know how to say thank you. And not just because their parents have told them to do so. It comes from their hearts, from their certainty that life is a gift. So they will show gratitude for the opportunity to be part of the world, from the air that they breathe to the time that every person spends listening to them. And they will be happy for it.

6 ~ They talk about ideas, not people

Happy people love to put their brains in motion. It makes them productive, creative, and boost their imagination so they can write or work on it later. They will spend time talking about ideas, testing them, and learning from books and people. On the other hand, they will not waste any minute judging people’s life choices, as they know that it is pointless. Of course, they will want to know enough so not to repeat their mistakes, but it is very different from gossiping, as you know.

7 ~ They take care of their health

We all know how essential is to be healthy for our happiness, but do we really care about it? Or do we only remember what our body needs when it is too late? Happy people don’t make this mistake. They will take good care of their body when they are in perfect health. They will exercise, eat balanced meals, and sleep well no matter what.

8 ~ They live in the present

Happy people don’t wait to be happy. They are happy now. Today. They don’t think that life will be better when they get a job or get married, or graduate, or become a parent, or buy a house. They believe that they can be happy even though they have none of these things. Above all, they don’t expect that any material achievement, or something that also depends on somebody else, can make them genuinely pleased in the long term.

9 ~ They have goals (and work on them)

Another thing that makes people feel happy about their lives is having goals and working on them. It gives them a sense of purpose, a reason to wake up every morning and say hi to the world. They know why they work hard, and why things are the way they are. They have a plan, a to-do list, and they check it and make something small happen every day. In other words, they know why they are alive.

10 ~ They take risks and embrace changes

Happy people are ready to pay the price to be happy. If it means leaving their job, moving abroad, starting their own business, or getting a divorce, they will. Not that they don’t care or suffer the consequences. But they understand that they can make no contribution to the world if they are unhappy about themselves. So they will take risks and embrace changes whenever it feels right.

The Takeaway

There is much more that can be said about habits of happy people, but these ten topics are a good way to start. They will require much discipline from you, have no doubt. However, nobody said that being happy is easy in the beginning.

The good thing is that, after a while, your body and mind will get used to your new state of mind. And when the idea becomes a real habit, then happiness will be part of your life.

Bio:

Kerry Creaswood is a young and ambitious writer from Savannah, GA. She is fond of various forms of art and thinks that everything we can imagine is real. To find more about Kerry – check her Twitter

Happiness Secret for Women

Message to my future self: To be happy: wash your hair, buy a red rose, paint your nails with green, put on a nice dress, go in the sun and take your picture.

elena-d-calin-happiness-secret-for-women

Your own happiness is your responsibility. You have the right to make things for yourself that generate the happiness energy in yourself. Never be ashamed of this or stop doing these things for yourself. Take the time. Don’t listen to people that tell you different. You deserve to be happy in your own way. No approval for your happiness recipe is needed. Anytime you want, cook yourself a happiness meal.

5 Unusual Ways How to Stay Positive Forever

stay-positive-forever

5 Unusual Ways How to Stay Positive Forever

Positivity is so important. It means less medical problems, a longer life and – most obviously but still most importantly – that you are happier. The thing is, how do you actually become more positive? That’s the 10,000 dollar question, isn’t it?

So that’s what we’re going to look into today. Five unusual ways for you to stay positive and keep the misery at bay.

1. Work on your mental resilience

The opposite of depression, according to Peter Kramer, isn’t happiness. It’s mental fortitude. So if you want to be able to stay positive, make sure that’s what you work on. How do you do that?

  • Sleep enough. Getting a good night’s sleep is one of the happiest things that we can do. What’s more, when we get enough sleep we make certain that we’re far less likely to ruminate and will be far quicker to switch away from negative thought.
  • Eat well. Stay away from processed foods, sugars, and alcohol. Instead, aim at eating plenty of the omage-3, protein, as well as whole grains, beans, potatoes, vegetables and other minerals. Stock up on vitamins in the B C, D, and E range.
  • Exercice. I don’t really need to tell you that, do I?
  • Practice mindfulness. Really. Do. Mindfulness makes you better able to step away from negative emotions. So make sure you spend more time being aware of who you are and that you are not your thoughts and emotions.

2. Give

Did you know that giving makes the giver happier than the receiver? That’s right. So, become more generous with your time and your money and you’ll find your life becoming most positive – both because you are giving and because you are sure to feel valued.

Start with what I call ‘random acts of kindness ’. Help somebody in the grocery line. Give a big bill to a particularly good street musician (the arts need to get sponsored after all), help out at a school, a charity or a church. It doesn’t matter how you do it, as long as you do it. Make both yourself and the world more positive.

3. Realize positivity is internal

We often get so obsessed with the world outside of our heads that we forget that happiness and positivity are only a matter of how we perceive the world. So make more time to work on that perception.

That means, taking ‘you’ time where you shut out the outside world through such practices as yoga or meditation or gratitude writing. So do not worry if you cannot – it is what you get from it, not what you put on paper and focus on your mental landscape.

It also means learning that how the outside world affects your inner harmony is largely a matter of perception.

For example, if during a bank robbery you get shot in the shoulder you could see that as an example of bad luck (you got shot) or of good luck (you didn’t get killed). The former will make the experience negative.  The latter will make it positive. Which one you choose to accept as your perception of the events as they transpired will decide how you view that event.

4. Focus on experiences rather than things

Money on time spent on experience have more bang for their buck than the same money spent on things. So, don’t buy a new couch when you’ve got one that’s perfectly alright. Instead, go on a holiday with the family.

Sure, you might think that the holiday will mean the money is gone and the couch will stick around for a very long time indeed, but is that actually accurate? After all, a lot of our lives are lived through our memories and a good memory can be incredibly valuable, both in terms of how you see the world as well as your relationships with – for example – your family.

The good will and good memories that you create during experiences can last a long time, far beyond when you’ve gotten used to the new couch and no longer really pay attention to it.

5. Realize the difference between status and happiness

A lot of the time when we think we’re pursuing happiness – like when we try to get a better job, get that new car, or buy a bigger house – we’re actually pursuing status. Now, don’t misunderstand, status has its uses. People with high status can get a lot of things done and can get people to do a lot of things for them.

Still, they are not the same thing and it is important that you realize when you’re pursuing one or the other. How do you know? It’s quite easy. When the underlying motivation is to impress others and the main route to happiness is other people’s appraisal of you, then you’re pursuing status.

If on the other hand, it’s just about how you feel about yourself, then it’s a matter of happiness.

Being able to differentiate between these two will mean that you can choose when you’re going to pursue your own positivity and when you’re just trying to get a leg up on the people around you.

Why is this important? Because status is a zero sum game. That means that when you gain status, the people around you have to drop in the regard of others. And that makes sense, after all, we’re all competing for the same mental real estate.

Happiness, on the other hand, is not zero sum. When I’m happier, you don’t need to be less happy. We can both be happier together. So, in the long run focusing on making ourselves and those people around us happier rather than higher status will create far more positivity. And that has to be what it’s all about, doesn’t it?

Last words

Positivity is a state of mind. Sure, that might sound banal, but that doesn’t make it less true. For that reason, the best place to seek positivity is within yourself, rather than in the world around you. That doesn’t mean the world around you doesn’t matter, but it matters far less than you might realize.

That’s why some monks – who live a life of abstinence and self-denial – are far more positive than the average person in society will ever be. They’ve realized that it’s all about having the right outlook in life and rather than focusing on having more, they focus on feeling more.

If you can embrace that, then nobody will ever be able to take the positivity and happiness away from you again.

dante-munnis

Dante Munnis is a content manager and contributor on the Essay Republic, who is interested in self-development, web related topics, and success issues. He shares ideas for students living a better life and building habits that stick. You can get in touch with Dan via Twitter.

Source of featured image: 1