7 Things Successful People Avoid

successful people

Do you consider yourself a successful person?

Before you answer, remember that the term “success” is somewhat relative. You may consider your cousin Larry a success because he has a Ph.D. and a high-paying job. But if his sights were set on Bill-Gates – level success, he may consider himself a failure.

When you reframe success as something you determine for yourself, it suddenly becomes attainable.

There is one common trait that successful people have: They consider themselves successful. These people are happy with what they have even though they may strive for more.

While they are busy reaching for their goals, successful people keep their eye on the prize. They understand that this means avoiding anything that could stand in the way of their productivity.

Successful people don’t bother with these seven things that could stand in the way of their productivity.

  1. Excessive alcohol

    There are many types of alcoholic drinking, but successful people avoid them all. They know their limits and stick to them. Because alcoholism is a multifaceted disease, it’s easier to fall into the trap than many people realize.

  1. Saying yes to everything

    Saying yes to the wrong thing can eat up your precious time and keep you away from doing things that are more productive. It’s true that opportunities are everywhere, but successful people are stingy with their time.

  2. Lottery tickets

You can be successful and win the lottery, but successful people don’t rely on luck to get ahead. If you understand that your choices are what makes or breaks you, you are on your way to becoming successful.

  1. Perfectionism

    In order to achieve your goals, you’ll need to know when to walk away. It’s easy to get lost in the pursuit of perfection when you should be focusing on greater things.

  1. Dwelling on the past

    We all understand that we can’t change the past. Unfortunately, that doesn’t stop us from obsessing over it. Successful people, on the other hand, don’t waste their time thinking about the past. They take the lessons learned from past mistakes and unfortunate encounters and move on.

  2. Negative friends

    You are the average of the five people you spend time with. This advice famously comes from successful motivational speaker Jim Rohn. If you want to be successful yourself, try spending time with people who are more successful than you. If you waste your time with Debbie Downers, their negative voices will always be stuck in your head.

  1. Skipping breakfast

    If you want to be successful, take time for breakfast in the morning. A 2013 Italian Journal of Pediatrics study review found that people who eat breakfast have a better overall nutrient consumption and cognitive performance than people who don’t. The simple act of eating a healthy breakfast will give you a better chance having a productive day.

Author’s Bio:

Trevor is a freelance writer and recovering addict & alcoholic who’s been clean and sober for over 5 years. Since his recovery began, he has enjoyed using his talent for words to help spread treatment resources and addiction awareness. In his free time, you can find him working with recovering addicts or outside enjoying about any type of fitness activity imaginable.

 

Here at Positive Words Research, we are looking to share with our readers original content that hasn’t been published on other sites so if you are comfortable with Positive Words Research being your sole publisher, we are more than happy to share with our readers your inspiring and empowering story.

 

 

Perfectionism Ruins Your Life! Here Are 7 Tips to Overcome It

perfectionism

Why can’t my skin be perfect?

I’m doing my best, but what if my boss hates the project?

I will win this thing!

If you dig deep enough, you’ll recognize some aspects of perfectionism deep within.

Everyone has faced the challenge of wanting to be better than anyone else. Being better than we already are is a good aspiration. But that’s not enough for us. We strive to perfection, and that’s when the problems begin.

The strive for improvement is an absolute necessity in life. It pushes you to learn more, try harder, and make progress. However, when this strive turns into perfectionism, it’s a reflection of your big ego. It makes you constantly unsatisfied with the things you achieve.

Have you ever had to deal with a perfectionist? Maybe a partner, a boss, or a parent? How impossible was it to make them happy with your achievements? Why would you impose such high expectations on yourself?

Perfectionism can really ruin your life. Daniel Winslet, a team leader from Best Essays, sees that from a student’s point of view: “Do you know how many students are striving to make their perfectionist parents happy? Too many. Since they are so used to being pushed, they start imposing impossible expectations to themselves. Although they can write well, they are not confident in their abilities. They hire professional writers even when there’s no need for that. A perfectionist doesn’t recognize the it’s good enough limit. That complicates their lives to a great extent."

Is there a way to control this state of being? Yes. It’s not easy, but it’s possible. We’ll list 7 tips to help you with that.

  1. Appreciate the Journey

Winning at something is easy to celebrate, right? But the moment when you meet a goal is not the only one worthy of a celebration. All small steps that get you there are important. Pay attention to the progress, no matter how insignificant it seems. This will teach you that every move forward is important. You’ll still keep an eye on the goal, but you’ll understand that the wider perspective is what matters.

  1. Understand the Value of Mistakes

When you look at the photos of popular Instagram yogis, you’re mesmerized with their power and grace. That’s because they show you the final result of a long process of making effort. Throughout that process, they fell down from a handstand countless times. They went through misalignments and pain. They are still not perfect. No one ever is.

Don’t let mistakes stop you from working further. Acknowledge their value. They teach you lessons. When you correct a mistake, you’re getting a lot better at what you do.

  1. Don’t Turn Ideals into Absolutes

Everyone has ideals. A perfectionist translates them into goals. If a perfectionist is a writer, they want to be the next Dostoevsky. When they write something, they don’t believe it’s good enough for that ideal. So they don’t bother publishing it.

Turn your ideals into guidelines; not absolutes.

  1. Don’t Rush with Your Judgments

Growth is a process. Goal-achieving is a process. Overnight success? There’s no such thing.

Let’s say you start a YouTube channel and you want to make it a huge success. Chances are, you won’t achieve that with a single video. You’ll have to keep working and engaging your audience. Each day, you’ll be attracting more viewers.

If you get disappointed after the first video because it doesn’t get you millions of views, you won’t continue doing this. If you keep going, you’ll reach the millions at one point.

Do not judge your achievements too soon! Let the process take its time.

  1. Avoid the Comparison Trap

Why is it called a comparison trap? – Because comparing yourself to other people traps you in a place of constant disapproval. You feel like you’re never good enough, since there’s always someone accomplishing more. This behavior is harmful.

You can compare yourself only to yourself. Think about where you are at this moment. Envision where you want to be. Pay attention to the progress and that will be good enough.

  1. Acknowledge Your Uniqueness

You can’t be someone else. You can’t meet other people’s expectations? That’s okay. It’s more important to find out who you want to become.

You’re a unique individual with special preferences. Your attempt to be perfect in the eyes of other people gets in the way of achieving your unique potential.

  1. Stay in the Now

Perfectionists constantly think about a more successful future. That’s not a bad thing, as long as it doesn’t take you away from the present moment. Do not keep your focus on the goals all the time. You can envision a better future for yourself, but perceive it as the growth you’ll achieve starting from this moment.

Staying in the present moment is not just a random mindfulness technique everyone is talking about. It’s wisdom. It works.

Will you sacrifice your happiness to perfectionism? Of course not! You’re already great. You can become better, but you shouldn’t be unhappy if you don’t become perfect. Each step forward is important, no matter how insignificant it seems.

Author’s Bio

Joan Selby is a life coach and a blogger; a graduate of California Institute of the Arts and a fancy-shoe lover; a writer by day and reader by night, giving a creative touch to everything. Find her on Twitter and Facebook

Here at Positive Words Research, we are looking to share with our readers original content that hasn’t been published on other sites so if you are comfortable with Positive Words Research being your sole publisher, we are more than happy to share with our readers your inspiring and empowering story.

 

Magic Sparkles of Happiness ~ I Used To Not Love And Now I Am Loving

By Elena D. Calin

Chapter 2 ~ I Used To Not Love And Now I Am Loving

“I’d far rather be happy than right any day." – Douglas Adams

used

I used to not feel loved and now I am feeling so loved. I just feel, now, so loved.

I used to not feel so alive and now I am feeling so alive. I just somehow feel alive now. I used not to feel like this. And now I feel like this.

I used to think I am not blessed and now I am feeling blessed. It just happened for me. I feel blessed. I used not to feel like this. I used to feel different. Now I feel blessed. It happened to me.

I used to not love people so much. Maybe I loved a few people. And now I am feeling love for so many people. I love singers, dancers, writers of movies, people that take care of the bakery in front of my house, the ones that take care of the park near me where I love to walk, and the neighbors that keep me secure in my house because we all live, together, in a building. And all the other people, so many people that are just amazing. Now I am just used to loving people.

I used to not love my body. And now I am feeling so much love for my body.

My body is a miracle; I used to not believe this. Just that now I do feel like this. I feel love for my body. I used not to feel it. And now I feel this love. I used not to respect myself so much and now I practice self-respect. Life is so much easier if I give self-respect to me when I need it. I love self-respect.

I used to think mainly at the not so good stuff that was happening all around the world. And I felt that these pictures are making me feel like I was living in a not secure world.

And now I am thinking mainly at all the good, beautiful, fabulous, mesmerizing, breath taking stuff that is happening all around the world. I have no control over all the not so good stuff which is happening in the world. Just that now I am also thinking that I have no control over the good stuff that is happening in the world.

This good stuff is multiplying in the world without me controlling it.

No matter if I have trust in people or I don’t, in reality there are these millions of people that are committed to see beauty in the world. They surf, they throw themselves from the cliffs into the water and then climb back to do it again. They run in races, they give birth to children, they dance, they teach other people how to dance, they just do all these millions of good stuff in the world.

And I could, and maybe actually I did, dedicate my life in visualizing all this beauty on Earth. The more I picture all this beauty, all this magic abundance, I know that I will not have time in my life to, at least, think of them, not to discover them, just to have a picture of them in my mind.

Then I remember that all is abundance. Therefore time is also in abundance for everyone. So I know and feel that I will have more than enough time to picture and discover all the beauty on this paradise which we all call Earth. Because we all live forever, right?

I used to not trust myself and now I am doing it.

I trust myself. And it seems that since I trust myself, others trust me also.

I used not to smile when I was walking alone on the street and now I smile whenever I remember to. And some people passing on the street besides me smile also without thinking why, just because they had a glance of my smiling face. And I like this, to make them smile, only because they passed me by. So I try to remember and do it as often as I can.

used1

I used to think other people consume my love and now I am happy that they feel my love.

Actually people only feel my love when I overflow with it. I used not to know this about life. I used not to know that you give, only when you overflow with something. I used not to overflow with love so often. And this is why, when I overflew love in the past, people felt my love, then the overflow stopped, so the love stopped, I did not feel it anymore and I believed that they’ve consumed my love.
And I so wanted to enjoy more of that love. Just that now I overflow daily with love, I am like a never-ending river. I am grateful for this. I know I used to not feel like this.

I used to not feel young inside my mind and now I feel so young. I know I used to feel I have an old mind; I felt it in the past even if I was less than 25 years old. I used to say that my face looks young but that I feel my mind is so old. Now I feel my mind is so young. I am happy that I will learn so many things in this life.

I used to not feel the freedom and now I feel the freedom.

I used to feel not free. I used to feel that all the people are not living freely, in their small concrete boxes all their life, in our small bedrooms. I used not to understand how they can live like this, not free.

Now I feel the freedom. Now I feel others freedom also.
There are so many free people in the world. There are so many people that freely do what they know they should do.
They follow the Love.

Now I think of all the people that are creating the life they want. And I allow them to do this, in my mind. Now I just do the same, feel free and create the life I want.
I discovered that people are allowing me to have my freedom, nobody actually tries to stop me from doing what I love and being who I love to be. Before this, I was living in illusion. I was trapped by my own perception.

I used to not have fun in what I was doing during the day and now I just have fun in my daily simple activities.

I have fun when I dress, when I walk, when I brush my hair, when I clean my teeth, when I write, when I just say doing nothing. I used to not have so much fun when I was writing and now I just have fun.

Somehow I make it fun. All these ideas come to me and make me smile. Sometimes I believe I can write forever, or I could get dressed forever, or I could brush my hair forever, or I could smile forever. Or I could look at the blue sky forever, or I could walk in the snow in quiet forever, or I could kiss someone forever. So many things that I want to do forever, and all of them are from this world.

I used to not feel good and now I just feel good.

I feel good! And I still have to sleep 7-8 hours every 16-17 hours. Just that now I feel good with this ritual of my human nature. And I still have to get dressed and go to work.

And I still have to eat three times and take other different little snacks during a day. And I still need to wash my body. And I still need to go to the toilet every day. And I still need to wash my hands every time after going to the toilet. And I still have to drink liters of water. And I am tired during the day from time to time. And I still have headaches from time to time. And I still need to buy food for my cat. And I still need to wake up in the morning. So many mornings!

Thankfulness to you and thankfulness to me also that I do all this every day. I used to not feel grateful for doing all these and now I feel grateful. Now I try to color all my doings with the colors of love and gratitude. I don’t try to do all I do, only out of love or gratitude; this is very hard.

But I try to do my daily activities, which I am already doing, with drops of love and gratitude in them. It’s like a rain of light pouring on all my doings. And somehow things changed without me directly changing them. Now I just feel good!

“Happiness depends upon ourselves." – Aristotle

Homework 2:

Please allow me to give to you another homework which will help you to build your own personalized happy moment:

Therefore, make your own blessings replacing the following sparkles with your own words:

I USED TO NOT * * * * AND NOW I AM * * * *

Remember that this is a positive exercise meant to lift you higher.

“My hope is that the description of God’s love in my life will give you the freedom and the courage to discover… God’s love in yours." – Henry Nouwen

Author’s word

This book contains positive affirmations that make you feel happy. I recommend you to read throughout the chapters, taking each sentence, one by one. The sentences are arranged in a certain serene flow but can also be read separately.

The writing of this book has begun with my daily writings. I had some blissful, full of love, mesmerizing days when I just felt that I want to connect my own being with positive, high and strong words. Then connect myself with everything around me, connect my consciousness with the reality outside me. In this state I began to write this book.

Books by the same author:
Hortensio and the Magic Stories
Leader versus Manager

 

Magic Sparkles of Happiness – Introduction and Book Description

Magic Sparkles of Happiness ~ Introduction and Book Description

magic sparkles

“Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of life, the whole aim and end of human existence." – Aristotle

This book contains positive affirmations that make you feel happy. I recommend you to read throughout the chapters, taking each sentence, one by one. The sentences are arranged in a certain serene flow but can also be read separately.

The writing of this book has begun with my daily writings. I had some blissful, full of love, mesmerizing days when I just felt that I want to connect my own being with positive, high and strong words. Then connect myself with everything around me, connect my consciousness with the reality outside me. In this state I began to write this book.

Here is what I wrote.

I remember that when I was 19 years old I had a revelation. In that state I clearly saw how everything in this world is strongly connected with all the others. Was alone in my house and I was writing my thoughts. It just stroked me, like a lightning – that interconnection – that bliss and clear knowledge of all being connected.

The connectedness revealed itself to me in a flash light. I saw with my inner eye how everything that ever existed and exists has a connection with everything else. It was also a logical connection in my brain and I could simply explain it, through words.

It was not just an unique feeling, it was more than this.

Was a certain unique blissful wise energy and it invaded my consciousness. I remember I wanted to talk to every person in the world right then and there. I was so convinced that exactly in that moment I could have proved to anyone through simple logic the strong and amazing connection between everything. For me that feeling was amazing and I still remember it now.

Since then, I never felt that moment of bliss cumulated with so much wisdom again. I’ve had other moments of bliss, other moments of revelations, but not like that one. Even if I am now 30 years old and I didn’t had another moment like that one, and maybe I will never have it again, I have another feeling related to that moment.

I feel that that knowledge is deeply implemented in me.

Is living inside my own being and nobody could ever pull it out of me. It’s like a deep truth for me. I know for sure that everything is interconnected in this world, in such a way that a substance of “something that existed" always remains in the world and continues to exist under a different form. It’s like the pure blissful essence is embedded at first under a certain form and at the end it takes a different/another form. Then the end is the beginning of the new beginning.

If you ask me for an example, is not easy to give. I can say that the magical particles, or the essence, are incorporated in the entity (the human) that is “thinking" (let’s say is thinking of a future tree). Then the essence somehow passes duplicated inside an “idea". An idea is a form because an idea is just a pattern of energy.

The idea of a tree

Same process continue and the essence passes in other forms as: the intention (another pattern of energy), the seed connected with the land, the tree itself from the reality connected with Earth, the flowers of the tree, the fruits of the tree, again seeds, again the land, again the air, the water, the human that eats the fruit and another one that makes a chair out of the tree, which initially was a seed. Therefore here is the interconnection between the chair and the seed, between the essence that was incorporated in an idea about a seed and the essence that was incorporated in a chair made by another human being out of the tree that grew from the seed.

The essence came from the same big mega-organism, a higher force like I call it in this book. The process begins again in this flowing, kind and friendly cycle. At the same moment, the purpose exists in every form and it exist in the overall big cycle. It is like someone was alive inside all of the existing forms and has created the overall form, the big one. For me that someone is a higher force.

I believe that this higher force express herself from the inside of every form. This higher force is feeling, learning about herself, from the inside of every form. I am a form of many. This higher force express herself through me, therefore feels happy through me.
The higher force feels through me. This entire mechanism makes me feel happy. All people are here to feel good and feel happiness.

Words about this book by Manuela Stancu (professional literature translator):

“Learning new things from a new book is usually what we look for in our readings. Having a good laugh or shedding a tear when it is finished is always a bonus. But getting hope from just reading a book is just wonderful. This is what I felt like after finishing reading Elena’s book Magic Sparkles of Happiness.

It all started with finding myself in every of its chapters. In giving thanks, in receiving blessings, in seeing things clearly, in loving every bit of the Universe.
It continued with the way Elena knew how to take me further with every one of her “magic sparkles". It ended (although end would not be the proper term for it) when I finished reading and I just wanted to read through it again, to find the things that I valued most, that I appreciate most, that I thought would help me be a better person.

And so I did, I browsed again through it and tried to keep every wise word in my heart for as long as I will be able to.

I recommend “Magic Sparkles of Happiness"…

… to all those who are looking for it – for the perpetual, omnipresent, enchanting happiness that fills your heart and never goes away easily. This is dedicated to those who know they deserve to be happy and make other people happy, as well.
This book is meant to be read by those of you who have lost hope or that don’t believe in anything anymore. It’s a book for kids, adolescents, adult and elders. It’s that book you know you have to read at least once a year. Will help you remind yourself of what you really are after, of what you want to do, of how you want your life to look like every day.

It was surprising that a person so young and apparently so fragile as Elena could have so much wisdom hiding inside of her and that she would have the inspiration to put it in writing in such a wonderful way. It’s almost magic and definitely an act of courage for someone who has studied economy almost all her adulthood to write like this. This is not her first book I had the chance to read, this is the second one and I know she is preparing a third, a forth, a fifth… and I am convinced that she will bring just as much enthusiasm and magic in our life with every one of them.

Last, but not least, I am inviting you to dare to read this book and try to really think about what every chapter stands for.

Try to “do your homework" thoroughly – and I don’t only mean the homework at the end of every chapter, but the one we have to do every day in order to become a better person, a kinder person, a more peaceful and happy person.

We have to wake up every morning feeling thankful that we get one more day and live our lives as Elena says: “You cannot enjoy the snow dressed in summer clothes. You cannot enjoy life without dressing yourself in gratitude."

All my gratitude goes to you, Elena! Love, Manuela"

“Happiness is not something ready-made. It comes from your own actions." – Dalai Lama XIV

 

 

 

Positive Words to Boost Your Child’s Self-Esteem

self-esteem

Self-esteem reflects one’s belief and attitude towards one’s own worth. It heavily influences choices, decisions and motivation to take care of self and explore full potential.

Development of positive and healthy self-esteem is crucial to the happiness and success of children and teenagers. Kids with high self-esteem are more probable to persistently strive for the accomplishment of their objectives and ambitions.

Those who have lower self-confidence do not consider themselves capable of achieving the goals; let important things slide and tend to be less persistent and stubborn to faceoff hardship.
They may have same goals as children with higher self-esteem but they are less stirred to pursue them to the upshot.

Parents and teachers can play a major role in boosting a child’s self-esteem.

The powerful words you say to your children, either positive or negative, stay with them for the rest of their lives. So, make sure you provide them with only positive and encouraging words to make them feel loved, competent and productive.

We have rounded up here the positive words to raise your child’s confidence and help build a positive self-image.

  • I am proud of you for giving such a great idea.
  • Thumbs Up!
  • You are doing very well.
  • That’s the best thing I have ever experienced.
  • You have done a marvelous job.
  • I’m getting excited to see what you do.
  • I knew you could do it.
  • You have worked very hard on that.
  • You speak how you feel and this is really good.
  • Thank you for putting a smile on my face.
  • You stayed so relax in that problem. I’m impressed!
  • I love hearing from you.
  • You are my hero.
  • You have solved my biggest problem. Thank You so much!
  • I always enjoy your company.
  • You are brilliant.
  • I have found you very creative.
  • Nothing can stop you from success.
  • You have figured out the solution quickly.
  • I am impressed the way you handled that.
  • You know just what to do.
  • Great! You finally did it.
  • You are a fantastic problem solver.
  • I know that was hard for you but you did it very well.
  • You are learning.
  • Failure is an opportunity to start again more wisely.
  • Amazing! How did you do that?
  • You have a sharp memory.
  • I trust you.
  • I will protect you from all around you.
  • My world is beautiful with you in it.
  • Believe you can and you are almost there.
  • It seems impossible until it is done.
  • You are brave.
  • I miss you when we are apart.
  • I feel protected with you.
  • You have a great sense of humor.
  • I know you are capable.
  • You deserve to be treated well.
  • Your choice matters.
  • Your opinions/ideas are worthy.
  • It’s fun to do things with you.
  • Your words are powerful.
  • You are my best friend.
  • You are a soft-hearted person and that’s what makes you valuable.
  • I’m grateful to have you in my life.
  • You do not need to be what others want you to be.
  • You have options.
  • You can disagree with someone you respect.
  • You never quit and this is what would make you succeed.
  • I love you.
  • You are important to me.
  • You are beautiful the way you are.
  • You have made me think about the things differently.
  • Thank you for being so helpful.

Hope, these words would help you keep your children motivated, confident and optimistic.

Practice providing your kids with positive words throughout each day. These will also help you develop a strong parent/child relationship.

Author:

Addison is journalist, social media expert and blogger. He is passionate technology writer and contributes towards mobile security, spy software for android, kids monitoring and teen issues. To know more about him follow twitter@addisonalbert55

 

Here at Positive Words Research, we are looking to share with our readers original content that hasn’t been published on other sites so if you are comfortable with Positive Words Research being your sole publisher, we are more than happy to share with our readers your inspiring and empowering story.