Lemons Into Lemonade: How To Turn Negative Events Into Positive Expression

lemonade

The fact is, many of us rely on creating to express our emotions. All of us on are especially familiar with this process. Creating to express our emotions in any form has potential to be a healthy and life-giving experience.

We can use art and creative writing as a means to turn our negative feelings into a reckoning for positivity. Here are some thoughts about negative experiences and how we can write them into a corner when they try to bully us.

The Dangers of Holding in Our Pain

Our culture glorifies the idea of holding in your emotions. Men are often called weak for being expressive, and women are called crazy for expressing their emotions in any way. Neither of these is fair, as emotions are simply a part of the human experience, and there’s nothing weak about admitting to what you feel.

Here’s the fact: suicide rates are on the rise. According to the National Center for Health Statistics, the suicide rate in the United States increased 24 percent from 1999 to 2014. The amount of adolescents — and we are talking early adolescents — that contemplate ending their lives or do end their lives as a result of cyberbullying has increased as well. In a recent UK study, 26 percent of respondents had suicidal thoughts, as a result of cyberbullying.

We have to normalize emotions and offer people practical ways to handle their trials in life. Even social work professionals admit we need to start thinking out of the box. I propose one of the best outlets for pain is through creative writing.

Write It Off

There is something so satisfying about forming the perfect sentence to describe what you’re going through. As long as you’re doing it for you and not to impress others, I think being able to work hard on this transfer from mind to paper is therapeutic. By writing about your negative experiences, you can process them, and learn from them. If you’re comfortable with it — share and relate it to others.

Here are some suggestions to turn your negative experiences into lemonade, through the power of writing.

Poetry Exercises

Poetry, lyric writing, and the like are the best places to employ your artistic license, due to the common “show don’t tell" mentality that’s so popularized in these communities. I personally find it useful to use poetry prompts in order to challenge yourself. The point of doing these exercises is to force you to write down your thoughts in a different way than just “I feel sad" or “I am angry." You also are usually writing less — but it’s harder to get a good flow going. It’s a new form of expression for a lot of freelance writers and similar creatives and can influence your other writings as well.

Descriptive Nonfiction

This is something I struggled with originally due to my past writing song lyrics with metaphors. I had to drop all of that — which I now consider being mostly fluff — and switch to describing the actual scenes around me. Descriptive nonfiction lives in “show don’t tell," more strictly than poetry does.

Retell your story. Use color, shape, and other physical descriptions. How red was your face from embarrassment or hurt? What were other people doing? How they moved, their facial expressions, and how did their face change and move as well? What words were they using? Of course, “show don’t tell" can also make for a traumatic retelling of a hard time, so gauge yourself and see if you can handle it first.

Letters to Yourself

Years ago, during one of my first breakups, I found myself writing letters late before bed. These letters were addressed to me, oddly enough. I never called it journaling or felt like I was writing a diary. I was very clearly writing a letter. Even though I was the recipient of these letters.

Physically writing my thoughts down on paper felt like I was transferring my emotions — like they were physically leaving my body. This was one of my initial experiences with the therapeutic effects of writing, and since then I’ve used writing to help myself through other breakups, loss of friends and family, and stressful life events.

Freewriting

It has been said that “bad writing is good for you," and this may certainly be the case in your situation. Freewriting offers the comfort of no restrictions – just straight up word vomit until you need to eat again.

Some find this to be a positive and freeing experience. It offers them a way to put some elbow grease into releasing their emotions, but they don’t have to worry about anything else. This isn’t typically the writing you show people, but certainly, you can if you would like. It’s your lemonade.

Get a Little Abstract

Use weird prompts and exercises — and by “weird" I mean unusual to you — to stretch your writing and give you new ways to express yourself. The thing with writing prompts is that they work like writing games. You have to use them to finish a piece based on rules and restrictions you don’t typically adhere to. Some of the most satisfying pieces of writing I’ve done have been based on odd prompts, and it always feels like a new way to express my thoughts, feelings, and beliefs.

How To Encourage Others

As I mentioned earlier, we need to normalize negative emotions. Make them something to talk about, and make it usual to talk about them. Let’s innovate a bit and give struggling people healthy and positive ways to handle their pain.

We must live by example first, because telling people to talk about their issues doesn’t shut out the voices — external or internal — that make them feel uncomfortable doing so. Being encouraging and transparent, ourselves, can do that.

Now, how much more as a writer can we share our experiences tangibly, especially with other writers? We all struggle with life, so writing them down for others may actually give them something to lean on, and maybe vice versa. Make your own lemonade from life’s hardships.

Ultimately, transparency begets transparency

With that in mind, let’s strive for honesty and humility with each other, so we can destigmatize depression, formulate it into something positive, be it through writing or whatever other form of creation you choose, and gain something from it rather than lose everything to it.

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How have you used writing or creativity to cope with bad experiences? Let me know in the comments below!

Author’s Bio

Avery T. Phillips is a freelance human being with too much to say. She loves nature and examining human interactions with the world. Comment or tweet her @a_taylorian with any questions or suggestions. Avery lives in the United States.

Here at Positive Words Research, we are looking to share with our readers original content that hasn’t been published on other sites so if you are comfortable with Positive Words Research being your sole publisher, we are more than happy to share with our readers your inspiring and empowering story.

 

Why Positivity Can Be The Best Defense Against Your Demons

defense

We all have our own inner demons, such as doubt, insecurity, low-self esteem, or a drive to reach perfection – just to name a few. Inherently, it feels impossible to shake them – but there is hope! The number one course of action to eliminate them forever is to channel the power of positivity. Our mindset affects the choices we make and how we perceive life in general. Therefore, the best line of defense is to utilize positivity in our minds.

This is why positivity can be the best defense against your demons:

  1. You stop seeing tunnel vision

Negativity is very limiting. When trapped by it, you only focus on unfavorable circumstances in the present moment as opposed to the possibilities of a better future, the bigger picture, or the bright side of a situation. When you start to think positively, your mind stops limiting itself to perceiving a negative and most-likely, distorted reality. Here, we’re able to see things for what they actually are, not just what we believe them to be. We also learn to stop associating ourselves with strictly negative traits and actually take a step back to view ourselves in our entirety, which is comprised of both good and flawed qualities, not just one or the other.

  1. It improves your overall health

Positivity affects both emotional and physical well-being and health. Emotionally, positivity prevents the symptoms of depression and anxiety and is a natural stress-reducer. In regards to the physical improvements, your immune system becomes less susceptible to sickness and disease since positive thinking triggers a stronger immune response. Furthermore, this also promotes better cardiovascular health. As a result, when both our mind and body are sound, we feel our best and are more inclined to make decisions that make us happy and healthy, not harmful like excessively criticizing or hurting ourselves.

  1. Positivity leads to emotional resilience

Obstacles stop feeling paralyzing with a positive mindset because believing in the best of things, despite the circumstances, helps you to overcome adversity. Negativity cages you in a self-victimizing mindset, which will make you less likely to take action or responsibility for yourself. When one faces difficult situations in their life with positivity rather than negativity, they develop emotional resilience, learn to use healthier coping mechanisms, and take lessons away from the situation rather than simply complain or feel helpless about it.

  1. It encourages productivity

Negativity inherently drains your energy, but positivity increases it. Consequently, this propels you to take more action and put more effort into your obligations in the work or school place. Positivity stimulates brain activity which leads to stronger cognitive function and attention span, which propels you to finish tasks and get things done more efficiently. In other words, you feel eager to accomplish goals one after the other which can translate into your personal life!

  1. Naturally attracts you to positive people

We attract what we are, and that is especially significant in the types of relationships we have in life. When you’re positive, others with a similar thought-process will gravitate towards you. Respectively, this leads to you creating a genuine social circle as well as a reliable support system. Positive people bounce off each other’s energy and uplift one another, not berate or put each other down. Sometimes, the fact that you have a solid group of loved ones with positive attitudes can completely put your demons at rest since they will always remind you that there’s more to you than your flaws.

Conclusion

At the end of the day, positivity will always be the best defense against your demons. It reminds you to think of a better future and improves your overall emotional and physical well-being. Positivity can even disprove therapy myths that would otherwise make you skeptical of changing one’s mindset. At first, it may seem that positivity may seem like a pseudo-inspirational concept, but it annihilates that belief by singlehandedly being the most significant element in a person can welcome into their life, mind, and heart because it changes the way they experience life overall.

Author’s Bio

Trevor is a freelance writer and recovering addict & alcoholic who’s been clean and sober for over 5 years. Since his recovery began, he has enjoyed using his talent for words to help spread treatment resources and addiction awareness. In his free time, you can find him working with recovering addicts or outside enjoying almost any type of fitness activity imaginable.

Here at Positive Words Research, we are looking to share with our readers original content that hasn’t been published on other sites so if you are comfortable with Positive Words Research being your sole publisher, we are more than happy to share with our readers your inspiring and empowering story.

 

What You Are Telling Yourself That Is Keeping You Single

single

Not all of us want to be in a relationship, which is completely fine. The rest of us oscillate between loving being single and wishing we weren’t. It rocks when we are playing the field and not having to check in with anyone, but it sucks when everyone around us seems to be bursting with joy in their relationships. Sometimes we cannot help but feel a little frustrated for being single.

Our search for healthy love is one of the most defining missions of our lives

The nagging question just keeps getting louder, “Is it me?". I wish I could tell you with all certainty that it is not you, but it just might be you. This does not mean that there is something wrong with you. I am sure you are amazing and capable of being in a fantastic relationship. But you see, most of the times, our single status has everything to do with our beliefs and attitudes.

The truth is that you hold more power over your romantic destiny that you ever thought possible. To a large extent, you create the world that you live in, consciously or unconsciously. There are a lot of bad habits that you may indulge in and things that you tell yourself that may be locking the doors to a lasting relationship:

  • I love being alone with all the freedom and creative time it affords me.
  • I do not deserve a relationship.
  • I am not good enough.
  • No one will ever love me.
  • I am not ready.
  • I have no time to date right now.
  • I cannot date a guy/girl who…..

When it comes to dating and relationships, sometimes you are your own worst enemy

What are some of the things you have told yourself that you think are sabotaging your ability to connect with potential partners?

Let us talk about the things that many of us are telling ourselves that are getting in the way of finding our soul mates.

I will date when…..

I will date when I am finished with my Ph. D.
I will date when I lose at least 10 pounds.
I will date after my career takes off.
I will date when I am ready.
I will date when I find the perfect guy/girl.
I will date when my child goes to school.

“The greatest amount of time wasted is the time not getting started.”
Dawson Trotman

There is a huge problem when you keep postponing something that is important to you. Firstly, the only time that you are guaranteed is ‘now.’ Many of us are obsessed with timing. There is no such thing as the right time. No matter what else your life involves at the moment, dating should never be wholly sidelined if you hope to get into a long-term relationship.

There are no guarantees in life, and no one can predict what the future holds. After all, life is a series of unexpected events. Indeed, you might find that life is more interesting when things do not go according to plan, rather than when everything is well choreographed. Makes life more authentic, doesn’t it?

You may think postponing dating buys you time but in reality, time will not wait for you. Right now is the perfect time to seek for your soul mate.

“Procrastination is like a credit card; it is a lot of fun until you get the bill.” Christopher Parker

I am looking for the perfect partner

When looking for a romantic partner, we all desire certain characteristics. However, no one is perfect. I have seen people wielding a long list of attributes that they want in potential soul mates. A certain level of education, given financial status, a particular religion, no children or a certain number of children, a certain number of teeth… Just kidding. The chances are that you might not find this package in a single individual. The pursuit of perfection leads to finding fault with everyone that you meet which will only work against you.

I am looking for the perfect guy/girl today will be later turn out to be I will never truly be in love.

Worse still, some of us have very unrealistic expectations. Snap back to reality and realize that you are also not perfect. So what if the guy/girl is a little rough around the edges? So what if she talks too loudly? So what if he is a tad too dark? There is nothing wrong with setting standards, but we must keep our expectations realistic if we do not want to be alone for the rest of our lives.

Affection is when you see someone’s strengths. Love is when you accept someone’s flaws.

All the good ones are taken

It seems as if the world has been overrun by fickle men and players, shallow women and gold diggers. Apart from you, of course! Is it possible? Is it really possible that all the billions of people out there are all either married or horrible? This is the lamest excuse to not play the dating scene. Worse still, it is a self-sabotaging excuse.

Telling yourself that all the good ones are taken is giving yourself a free pass to throw in the towel and let yourself off the dating hook. You do not have to put yourself out there, after all, the good ones are taken!

Look at the flipside. Out of the billions of people in the world, you only need one person who is right for you. You need to reframe your mindset.

The perfect partner does not exist, but there is a partner who is right for you.

The sad reality is that if you go through life believing that there are no good men or women out there, you will not find any. Your mind is always inclined to look for evidence to support what you believe.

Interesting fact:
When you believe all the good ones are taken, anytime you come across one who is unavailable, you will think he is the greatest thing you have ever seen. When you come across one who is single, you will search for flaws, and you will surely find them.

Remember, our thoughts are energy; energy that radiates and attracts like experiences. Many of us miss out on finding love by holding on to lies: about ourselves, about men and women. You must realize you are what is keeping you single. Seeking love is not an easy task. The first step is to fight the patterns inside us that hold us back. We cannot shield ourselves from what we might find out there, but we can empower ourselves with the right tools for the job by cleaning up our thoughts.

Author’s Bio

Christopher Brown
Christopher D. Brown
created the website RedesigningTheMind.com

Here at Positive Words Research, we are looking to share with our readers original content that hasn’t been published on other sites so if you are comfortable with Positive Words Research being your sole publisher, we are more than happy to share with our readers your inspiring and empowering story.

 

 

10 Ways To Show Your Partner How Much You Appreciate Him/Her

partner

If you`ve already found someone you love and who loves you back, you`re really happy! At the beginning of your relationship, everything looks so romantic and wonderful and you may think you`ve finally got an ideal relationship… But over time, it can be a little too easy to fall into a rut and even make a lot of mistakes that, unfortunately, can crack your loving relationship! In order to avoid any kind of bummers like infidelity, breakups, cooling off and so on, you have to teach to be an appreciative partner! It’s really very important because appreciating someone you love is a great daily work that won`t require too much effort. However, it will definitely help you protect your long-term relationship. Luckily, there are so many things you can do to show your love and fidelity. Here are top 10 ways to let your partner know how much you appreciate him or her.

 

  1. Hug your significant other

Leave your business for a few minutes and give your loved one an appreciative hug! Don`t forget that a touch is a basic human need and your touch – cuddling – at the right moment can also convey your appreciation and affection.

 

  1. Give your loved one a massage

We all love massages! Use this trick to show your love and relax your partner after a long working day.

 

  1. Organize a fancy date

Try to plan a spontaneous romantic date in some special place and surprise someone you love. Break the routine of your everyday life and express your affection. Plan a wonderful dinner in your partner`s favorite restaurant and order his or her favorite meal. Your partner will be grateful for such a grand gesture of your love!

 

  1. Leave little love notes or send sweet messages

One of the most romantic ways to show you love your partner is to leave special notes or send cute messages during the day. In such a simple way, you can express your feelings. Show your loved one that you`re constantly thinking about her or him.

 

  1. Notice the little day-to-day things

It’s hard to notice the little things your partner does every day for you because household labor becomes commonplace for us. But it will be really pleasant for your loved one when you say “Thank you, my dear, that you ironed my favorite shirt for today’s business meeting!" Show her you love her and everything she does for you! Or “Oh, how well you mowed the lawn! It looks amazing! You have great hands!" Express your appreciation to him because he’s a special man in your life!

 

  1. Compliment your special someone

Everyone loves the compliments, especially if you say them sincerely. Try to compliment your partner every day because it’s really nice to be appreciated by someone you love!

 

  1. Spend a lazy day together

You`re both so busy… Just remember when you last watch TV sitting on the couch together? What? You can’t remember… Well, show to your partner how much you care and need him or her. Spend a lazy day together – eat junk food, watch movies and snuggle… Be sure, your partner will be happy for the break and your love. Moreover, you’ll both be happy to get some special time together.

 

  1. Buy an unexpected gift

The key word is “unexpected"! So don’t focus on just luxury gifts for her or him. In this case, the monetary value is not important, it’s the fact that you want to give something “just because"! It can be inexpensive, but meaningful or desired one. It can be even a handmade gift!

 

  1. Believe in your partner and always support him or her

Try never to doubt in your partner, whatever happens. Your support and fidelity will help your partner realize how much you love him or her!

 

  1. Listen to your loved one

Sometimes you ignore your partner when he or she tells you something. But such behavior can be really hurtful! Try always to listen to your loved one. Even if you find it not so interesting or you feel you`ve heard it all already. Make the effort and listen to your significant other. Listening is a key to a harmonious relationship.

Conclusion

Being a good partner is learning to show your appreciation for the little things and little actions every single day. It isn`t so difficult to do, but it is very important for your relationship! Never forget that!

Author’s Bio

Andrew Guerra is an editor of https://bestquoteslist.com/

Here at Positive Words Research, we are looking to share with our readers original content that hasn’t been published on other sites so if you are comfortable with Positive Words Research being your sole publisher, we are more than happy to share with our readers your inspiring and empowering story.

 

 

Best Ways To Use A Journal To De-Stress

de-stress

Technology is advancing quickly but some values and traditions keep up with it while staying the same. One of those traditions is definitely journaling. Young generations find that the beauty of journals and journaling far surpasses blogging and online diary keeping – pen and paper are here to stay.

At the end of a long day, it’s best that you sit down with a cup of tea or coffee, turn off all of your devices and start writing. Not only is journaling popular and beautiful but it also has a therapeutic effect and helps you de-stress.

If you still haven’t decided to pick up the pen and begin, here are some benefits that you’ll notice if you journal every day.

  1. Journaling can help you get rid of negative thoughts

When you put those words on pen and paper, you slowly start to let go of all of your negativity. Words are now on paper, not in your head. You’ll find that it’s a lot easier to go about your life once you release all of your bad energy on the page. It would become easier to de-stress.

This kind of experience is something you would hardly have online since typing does not give the same satisfaction.

One study even says that if you write your thoughts down and then throw them away, you’ll be able to keep them at bay for a while. Of course, thoughts regenerate but once you throw them away, you’ll be able to forget about them, at least a bit.

  1. Journaling is empowering

“Through journaling, you can track your own life and what happened to you, how you felt and what made you sad – it gives you perspective. This new perspective on your life will enable you to draw lessons that you would otherwise miss completely", – explains Carol Garner, a Psychology writer at Bestbritishessays.

Whatever bothers you, write it down and after a while, you’ll be able to see what you can learn from that.

  1. It gives you a chance to spend time without technology

Technology can sometimes have a therapeutic effect on people, especially when they use social media to connect with friends and family etc. However, it’s always a good idea to turn off all of your devices and dive into the wonderful world of writing your thoughts down.

  1. Gratitude journaling reduces levels of stress and makes you happier

Gratitude journaling is a great practice where you write down everything that you are grateful for or happy about in your journal. This is believed to have a therapeutic effect since it draws positive energy and brings it to you. It helps you learn to look out for the better things in life. After a while, you’ll be noticing details that you are thankful for with an ease and all thanks to your journal. It can even help you think less about negative things in your life by simply thinking more about good things.

  1. Give yourself wise advice

Once you notice that there are lessons to be learned in your journal, you’ll see all of your mistakes and wrong steps. Write about it in the third person so you can have some more perspective on the whole situation.

Jason Horn, a Personal Coach at Ukservicesreviews comments: “Journaling about a big decision you’ll have to make or a tricky situation that you are in will help you see it clearly. Then you could give yourself the kind of advice that you give to your friends and listen to what your heart tells you. Journaling has that kind of therapeutic effect on people and it helps them realize what they need to do".

How to Start Writing a Journal and de-stress

There are plenty of ways that you could start journaling. First, you could get an actual notebook and write in or a new email where you’ll send yourself journal entries, or a private blog. After you have decided upon this, you’ll probably wonder what to write and how to write it.

For the beginning, you could use some tools to help you out:

Studydemic or Academized to give you some writing guidance if you don’t think that you are a talented writer.

AcademAdvisor and Bigassignments are online editing and proofreading tools that can be useful to you if you are a perfectionist or if you simply want your journal to be beautiful and mistake-free.

Oxessay is a formatting tool which will give you an excellent insight on formatting – it was recommended by Uktopwriters.

Writingpopulist is a website that will give you plenty of fresh, quality writing tips and advice.

Australian help is a grammar checking tool that will make sure that your text displays no grammar mistakes.

Conclusion

You should definitely start journaling right away – with all of these health benefits, you will learn to de-stress sooner than you think. Let the journal into your life and allow it to guide you through your emotions.

Author’s Bio

Freddie Tubbs is an Australian business writer at Revieweal. Besides, he is running educational blogs at Essayroo and Australianreviewer.

Here at Positive Words Research, we are looking to share with our readers original content that hasn’t been published on other sites so if you are comfortable with Positive Words Research being your sole publisher, we are more than happy to share with our readers your inspiring and empowering story.