God and me ~ Funny dialogue 7: Secrets!

God: Yellow!

Me: Stop bothering me and stop behaving like you are cool. You are not!

God: What happened?

Me: What? Nothing.

God: Come on. What happened?

Me: Uf! I have this website and I am trying to increase the traffic and I don’t know how.

God: Maybe I can help.

Me: You can not. What do you even know about the internet ?!?

God: Everything! I have created it.

Me: OMG, again with the same line… you have created everything and stuff… whatever… just leave me… I am doing something serious and you are distracting me.

God: Maybe you should do something fun… instead of serious.

Me: You know? I can not create like this. I should… like it. It should be… you know… fun.

God: Yes, fun, good idea.

Me: I will just do something fun for my website.

…After some time…

Me: God?

God: Sorry! Bussy!

Me: You are not busy. You never are.

God: What happened? You did something fun for your website and people like it?

Me: Yes. Exactly. How do you know?

God: It would clarify if I told you that I have created the entire Universe, with a lot of magic ingredients, and fun is one of my secret ingredients?

Me: Nope. And stop saying all these secrets to me. My friends always tease me because they don’t know from where I say the strange things I say.

God: From me of course.

Me: Exactly. This is what I am saying. So stop telling them to me.

God: Why? You always hear me.

Me: Uf! Whatever.

God: Hey? Do you want to know my future plans for humanity?

Me: NO!

God: What? Come on. Everybody wants to know this. Is like the biggest secret ever.

Me: Not interested.

God: I will tell you another day.

Me: Don’t.

God: I will.

Me: No.


Moral: There are no secrets. God is always more than willing to share everything with everyone.

God and me ~ Funny dialogue 6: Are you in love again?

God: Hi!

Me: Leave me.

God: What are you doing?

Me: Not your business.

God: Come on. Let me see.

Me: No.

God: Don’t be.

Me: I am not. Just stay out of it.

God: Why? What is all about?

Me: Nothing.

God: Are you in love again?

Me: See? This is why I don’t let you. You just like to comment on my things.

God: So what? Who is it?

Me: Nobody. I am not in love again.

God: Then what is it?

Me: Is nothing actually. I said that just to keep you interested.

God: But I am already interested. Let’s do something interesting.

Me: See? This is why I don’t tell you anything. Because you always put me to make all kind of things.

God: Uf! Then what do we do?

Me: Nothing. We just stay and do nothing.

God: Ok, then we will stay together and do nothing.

Me: Exactly.

God: Hmmm. This is actually wise.

Me: Yes.

God: Because you are my creation.

Me: You had to say it. Couldn’t help yourself.

God: Yes, couldn’t! Is true you know.

Me: Don’t care!


Moral: God is never bored with you.

Negativist and Positivist ~ Funny dialogue 1: Stop copying me!

Negativist: Awful.

Positivist: Lovely.

Negativist: Horrible.

Positivist: Nice.

Negativist: OMG.

Positivist: Yes, OMG!

Negativist: Stop copying me.

Positivist: Stop making my life sad.

Negativist: I am not making it. It is already sad.

Positivist: No! It is not. My life is beautiful.

Negativist: You are living in your illusions!

Positivist: It is reality.

Negativist: Hahahahahahha

Positivist: This is why one of my rules is not to talk with negative people.

Negativist: Ok, butterfly!

Positivist: That is nice. Thank you.

Negativist: Hmmmmm… not.

Positivist: OMG you are hopeless.

Negativist: Remember. Think Positive!

Positivist: Ignoring you.

Negativist: Ignoring you also.

Positivist: Stop copying me.

Negativist: Stop making my life happy. I don’t like it.

Positivist: Bye, bye butterfly.

Negativist: Where are you going?

Positivist: In my illusions.

Negativist: Can I come also?

Positivist: Hmm. Ok!

Negativist: Flying away. Goodbye, cruel world. Going, never to return again.

Positivist: OMG, shut up or I will not take you with me anymore.

Negativist: Such a loss.

Positivist: You are such a bad company.

Negativist: For a positivist, you are not too positive.

Positivist: I will just not fight with you anymore. Fighting you just gives you more energy.

Negativist: No matter what I do, I always think of you. You don’t know what you mean to me.

Positivist: Oh, this is so lovely.

Negativist: Meaningless words.

Positivist: Just admit it, you too have a positive side.

Negativist: Yes, you are my positive side. I am 100% negative.

Positivist: What would you do without me?

Negativist: I would be 100% negative and feeling damn good about it!

Positivist: !?!!!!?!!!!


Moral: The part of the mind that is positive and the part of the mind that is negative are always talking with each other, and the talk is not so bad as we might think.

God and me ~ Funny dialogue 4: Hopelessness is not fun

Me: Uf…

God: What’s wrong?

Me: Awful.

God: Are you ok?

Me: Horrible.

God: Just tell me, I will make it better for you.

Me: No.

God: Why? Don’t worry I can do it.

Me: Yeah…. right.

God: Honestly I can do it.

Me: This is too hard, you definitely can not do it.

God: I will do it on your behalf.

Me: If I can not do it, for sure you can not do it.

God: I will do it for you in the simplest and happiest way.

Me: This is ridiculous.

God: Just have faith.

Me: Have what?…. faith?…. wait a minute… who are you?

God: I am God.

Me: God is speaking with… me?

God: Definitely. Always.

Me: But I am not spiritual enough to talk to you.

God: You don’t need to. Any human can speak to me. This was and always will be.

Me: Well… I guess I am ok now.

God: Hmmm, but you seemed a little sad few moments ago. What changed?

Me: A few moments ago I was a nobody and now I am speaking with God… so I must also be somebody if I can speak with You.

God: You are a loving child of mine. I Love You to Infinity and Beyond.

Me: That ready feels nice.

God: Ok, goodbye now. Call me if you need me… but I will still hear you and come and help you, even if you don’t call me… hopelessness is not fun… oh… and raise your eyes… someone is looking for you. Bye now!

Me: Who is looking for me?…. oh… yes, I am the father… what?…. omg… thank God my wife and baby are ok. This is a miracle!


Moral:

God is always there with you, helping you, even when you have forgotten Him.

Content of the collection “God and me – Funny dialogues”

God and me – Funny dialogues is a collection of dialogues written by Elena Calin, the founder of Positive Words Research. The dialogues are supposed to be between God, the funny part of Him, and different people of various ages, from 4 years old to older age.

Content of the collection God and me – Funny dialogues:

  1. God and me – Funny dialogue 1: Love
  2. God and me – Funny dialogue 2: I failed
  3. God and me – Funny dialogue 3: Challenging!
  4. God and me – Funny dialogue 4: Hopelessness is not fun
  5. God and me – Funny dialogue 5: Go for it!
  6. God and me – Funny dialogue 6: Are you in love again?
  7. God and me – Funny dialogue 7: Secrets!

Hope you Super Enjoy these dialogues!